Ringside Confessions
by starbuckjade
Summary: Takes place right after Unfinished Business. This fic gives the answer to the burning question of why Kara did what she did on New Caprica.


**After watching Unfinished Business all I could think was why?! Why would Kara do that? So I wrote what I think is a likely answer. Enjoy.**

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They fell to the mat in a tangle of limbs, disengaging themselves as just afterwards. Dee moved into the ring to help her husband up, but he stubbornly refused. He told her and everyone else to leave, waiting until they did so to address Kara.

There were things they needed to discuss that needed complete privacy and he wasn't leaving until he got the answers he was seeking.

He pulled off his glove strap with his teeth, using his free hand to undo his right, "I need to know why."

Kara followed suit with her own boxing gloves, "Why do I do anything Lee? Because I'm a frak up. Plain and simple."

He ground his teeth together, staring her down, "That's not a reason and you know it. Tell me the fraking truth." He nearly shouted the last words to her, but he was tired of playing games with Kara Thrace.

She looked him straight in the eye, but lost her nerve as she began to speak, ending up staring down at her hands, "Because you mean too much to me Lee." She sighed, not looking up at him, "I've been in love with you for years Lee, even if it's wrong I can't help it. You're my best friend, my wingman, my running partner, the man I compare all others to. You are the first thing I think of when I wake up and the last thing I think of when I go to sleep, even on CAP whether you're there or not my thoughts always stray to you. You are the first person I want to confess my sins to and the first person I want to talk to after something has happened, good or bad. You are the reason why I never gave in to Leoban after all those months of imprisonment. You were the one I dreamed of holding me after every time I stood over Leoban's bloody corpse knowing that in a matter of hours he would be back and it would start all over again. You, Lee Adama are the reason I get up in the morning, the reason I keep fighting even when all the fight has gone out of me. And that's why I ran." She finally looked up and into his eyes, "Because you mean everything to me Lee, everything. And as much as I would love to be your girlfriend…your wife even, I'm petrified that I will frak it all up. I'll do something or say something and I will lose you forever. I'll lose a part of myself that I can't live without anymore."

He stared at her in shock; he had no idea that was how she felt. Gods they were the same fraked up person in two separate pieces.

He watched her lay down on the mat, staring up at the ceiling as if it was the map to Earth. He crawled to lie beside her, on his stomach, he turned to regard her.

Even caked with blood and sweat she was beautiful, too beautiful he realized.

She turned to look at him, "I think you should know; Kara Thrace still loves Lee Adama."

They shared a small smile, "Lee Adama still loves Kara Thrace too."

She turned away from him then and he saw why, the tears pooling, ready to be unleashed.

"I'm not giving everything up Kara….I'm with Dee now and she's…" he tried to come up with a word to describe his wife but his mind completely blanked.

"She is a better wife than I will ever be." Kara answered for him and he nodded in agreement.

"I won't just leave her, Dee deserves more than that." He explained as much to Kara as to himself.

"I'm not asking for you to Lee." She sighed, "My marriage to Anders ended before it began. He was just so easy…." She trailed off, "He didn't demand anything of me, ask for more than I could give, he was just there with that stupid smile on his face ready to love me without caring why."

Kara chuckled as a thought occurred to her, "Sam is a puppy. One that you take home with you because he's cute and adores you the second you pick him up. But he's not the man you fall in love with, the one you spend the rest of your life with, he's only a temporary distraction. That's what he was for me and once I realized that I couldn't go on with that farce of a marriage."

She turned and gave him a sad smile, "But you're not like me, Lee. You have something good with Dualla and you shouldn't frak it up because of me. I want you to be happy Lee, even if I'm not a part of your life anymore. "she stood, holding her hand out to him.

He took it, letting her pull him to his feet. He realized they were standing too close, much to close. His eyes darted to hers and down to her lips and back again. Where was the obnoxiously loud crowd to keep him from throwing her down on the mat and making love to her like they did on New Caprica, to scream out as loud as he could that he was and would forever be in love with Kara Thrace.

She stepped back away from him before he could act, "But I want my wingman back, my running partner and my best friend." She stepped out of the ring and made her way to the door, "I'll fight for them Lee and I will take whatever you have left to give."

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**Review people, seriously I know you want to.**


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